Egg Day!

Actually, yesterday was egg day.  After an afternoon at the doctor’s office getting my staples taken out, and having my mother cart me around to run a few errands, I was pretty wiped out.  Yesterday morning I did enjoy the perfect marriage between a Campo Lindo egg and a small bit of Shatto Farms butter.  Scrambled, nothing fancy.  First of all, who in the hell has a clue about how ONE egg even looks like in a pan?  Damn it cooked fast.  Anyway, that was one wonderful egg.  After a week of clear liquids, it was a welcome break.  I had another one this morning.  It’s kind of a Zen thing to get everything ready to cook one single egg, put it on the plate, sprinkle a tiny bit of kosher salt on it, then sit down and consume it slowly.  Then that’s it…….no bacon, no toast, no slamming down a quart of orange juice……breakfast is over.  It’s not a bad or depressing thing, it is just so much different than I thought it would be. 

I think I’m starting to learn what everyone meant when they said it could take at least three months to adjust to the changes.  Having to re-learn what “full” feels like isn’t going to be a small task.  For example, I’ve heard people say at least fifteen times “now on egg day, you won’t even be able to eat the whole thing”.  I definitely ate the whole thing.  I ate it and I wished I could have had about five more.  I guess the new stomach was full, but the disconnect between what your body knows and what your brain thinks is going to be a huge hurdle to overcome.  I can recognize what I believe are the telltale signs (I’ll have to ask others who have had the surgery) of my stomach being “full”…..a little bit of tightness, the feeling that I might be about to burp but I don’t…..but that in NO WAY keeps the brain from flipping out every time a stupid KFC commercial comes on, or I’m watching Tony Bourdain chow down with a Ramone.  It is totally possible to be “full” now and still have the brain make me salivate and try to trick me into thinking my stomach is going to start growling (which it doesn’t anymore, a strange thing in itself). 

I’m not really distressed about this or anything, it’s just going to be a big learning curve.  Today has been better than yesterday, and yesterday will be better than today.  I knew it was coming, but it was like so many things taken as some kind of disclaimer from doctors and professionals…”it could take you three months to readjust”…..yeah yeah, whatever……holy shit, in this instance they weren’t kidding. 

Other than that, someone needs to create chewable vitamins that don’t taste like a sandy, chalky piece of lab created lemon rind.  And that bastard of an incision is giving me a break, I’m almost beyond needing any pain meds.  I really need to try and drive in the next couple of days…just getting out of the house to get gas will be like an adventure. 

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