Okay, this short entry has absolutely no purpose other than expressing my joy about a couple of insane deals this week…..
First of all, I scored a 7.25 quart round Le Creuset French oven for a mere $133.00 shipped, AND an Artisan series Kitchenaid mixer for…………wait for it………….. $79.00 shipped (the pro series is almost too tall for my low kitchen cabinets, so I opted for this rare deal). Now that I think about it, I don’t think I mentioned the 20 quart All Clad stainless stockpot I got for $33 a couple of weeks ago. All of these deals were found at my secret online open-box merchandise seller………I don’t think you could get prices like these from a crackhead on eBay. If you’re a friend of mine that knows about my secret online retailer, just remember that if you mention it to anyone I will seriously fuck you up. You will get the full chipotle battery acid absinthe drip treatment, so help me god. This is about my gloating and holding it over your head, not about you using the knowledge to gloat or hold it over anyone else’s head. Just to note…on the photo below, all four French ovens and the mixer ended up costing me a total of around $375 shipped. Take THAT suckas!
Anyway, pretty uneventful here in the snowed-in confines of my beautiful Platte County resort. Met up with friends at the Velvet Dog last night, and we ended up getting kicked out because of the most anti-climactic reason you can imagine…….someone in our group accidentally (not really) used the ladies room. In a ghost town of a bar that doesn’t sound like it should be a hanging offense, but this weasel of a doorman who could have passed for a Mario Cantone action figure with a nifty little headset gave us the heave-ho. Totally unreal. I’m sure our waitress bitch-slapped the doorman after she realized she just lost a group of ten that had settled in for the evening. Seriously, ten years ago when I was doing a LOT of damage to the local bar scene you had to at least throw blows to get tossed…..and even then they just kicked out the person who started it. And the doormen were usually guys who could get away with braining you with a mag-lite, and you knew they’d do it……not one of these little metrosexual pilates toned mirror boys. What the fuck? The demise of the club scene has to go back to all of these pointless smoking bans….the last frontier for people who can’t live without minding other people’s business (under the total bullshit guise of it being “for the health of the employees”). Seriously, if you’re a smoking ban proponent, go fuck yourself. I can obviously be more eloquent than that when the mood strikes, but for now you can go and try to stick your head even farther up Rob “It’s for the CHILDREN” Reiner’s ass. If you don’t want your clothes to smell like smoke, stay the hell out of KCMO bars and enjoy horking down a heapin’ platter of a Chili’s awesome blossom with the rest of your pathetic soccer mom cronies out in the stripmall wasteland known as Johnson County. You don’t care about public health, that’s just the excuse you use to make your pet peeve into a law. I know I sound harsh and have gotten WAY off the subject here, but I want you know, and I mean this from the bottom of my heart…….from one non-smoker to another……..go and find a cause that actually makes a difference for someone besides yourself. And if you start bringing up your gramma or someone close to you who died from years of smoking, then you’re about two steps away from being one of those freaks who holds up the dead baby pictures at abortion protests.
Anyway, no idea how I got so bipolar……joyful one minute and angst-filled the next. It feels good though, the heart wants what it wants. Overall it has been a good week. I’m hoping it thaws enough to take the dog down to the river a couple of times over the weekend. It’s nice to make it through the first holiday season of my life with no weight gain, therefore no heart-wrenching New Year’s resolution that happens year after year after year. Right now it’s all about finishing school, staying gainfully employed in the middle of a corporate tug-of-war, and managing to somehow become happy enough with myself to finally focus on the wellbeing of others. Unless they are one of those IDIOTS who whine about smoking bans and foie gras…… although maybe if we give the baby its bottle it will delay the logical conclusion of that fundamentalist mindset…….of course I’m referring to the passing of legislation that will require people to lose weight to save everyone money on health insurance. Mark my words, it will happen. In a land where our mantra seems to be “freedom as long as it doesn’t hurt anyone else”, there is no shortage of people who spend their days figuring out ways that your personal choices are hurting everyone else.